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All apostrophes in the middle of fantasy names are now to be pronounced "boing."

That is all.


( 105 comments — Leave a comment )
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Jul. 10th, 2007 08:24 pm (UTC)
I love it! I may have to add an apostrophe name to my next work, just so I can giggle to myself when I go through revisions!
Jul. 10th, 2007 09:12 pm (UTC)
*hides face in hands* The monkeys mock us. We have failed.

...Unless you established that apostrophes in your world's names were pronounced "boing," in which case that would be, in technical terms, full of awesome.
(no subject) - jimhines - Jul. 10th, 2007 10:17 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - latheos - Nov. 24th, 2011 08:30 pm (UTC) - Expand
Jul. 10th, 2007 09:47 pm (UTC)
Dear Evil Overlady,

The Comma Police thank you for helping to foil the plot to steal apostrophes from their proper place to supply the apostrophe-crazed addicts of El'fland, Mid'leea'rth, and Per'n.

With your continued cooperation, we will win the war on apostrophe abuse!
Jul. 11th, 2007 03:29 am (UTC)
We thank you for your ceaseless battle against this scourge of the English language. Without your hard work in the grammar trenches, the entire world would look like the Internet and the Internet would look like a Neopets guild headquarters. Today grammar, tomorrow the world!

(When we consolidate our empire, our first act as reigning Evil Overlady will be to load airline personnel who misuse "momentarily" into an airplane that will, in fact, be in the air momentarily.)
(no subject) - cameoflage - Nov. 24th, 2011 03:02 am (UTC) - Expand
Jul. 10th, 2007 10:39 pm (UTC)
Gboinkar, Naboingtoth and Taboinglon aren't going to be happy about this - do you really want a horde of piqued Narn pounding on your door? I don't know if the pakboingmaboingra are going to be much trouble - but beware the wrath of the Anlaboingshok! Not so much for the dishonor to themselves, but to the Entilboingzha! They live for the One (apostrophe), they die for the One.

I daresay you would not be safe even hiding out on Zboinghaboingdum.... And then there's the wrath of the Drakh Shivboingkala...!
Jul. 11th, 2007 02:21 am (UTC)
a horde of piqued Narn

I believe the proper collective noun is "a bat squad".
(no subject) - issendai - Aug. 1st, 2007 04:23 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - furr_a_bruin - Aug. 1st, 2007 05:47 pm (UTC) - Expand
Jul. 11th, 2007 01:53 am (UTC)
Imagine my embarrassment, I've always pronounced it "throatwobbler mangrove".
Jul. 11th, 2007 03:35 am (UTC)
Strangely, "throatwobbler mangrove" is the word for "boing" in several Californian dialects.
Jul. 11th, 2007 02:06 am (UTC)
Is it too late to submit that all words with pointless diacritics be summarily changed to "gazornenplat"?

Imagine how much better Eragon would be.
Jul. 11th, 2007 03:33 am (UTC)
We are open to suggestions regarding substitutions for unnecessary diacritics, but we doubt that anything short of cleansing nuclear fire can improve Eragon. When we consolidate our empire, we intend to remove the pages of all copies of Eragon and replace them with the complete Lord of the Rings and a set of Star Wars: The Good Trilogy DVDs. No one will notice the difference, but it will make us feel better.
Jul. 11th, 2007 03:06 am (UTC)

Wait'll the LboingDoran Hegemony hears about this...

The Hboingreli will love it.
The Yelisi probably will too even if it does mean everybody gets called things like Sboingdran.
The Altani will be Annoyed when the affectionate diminutives of names like Tuu Ira Isan come out TboingIsan. (Tuu Ira Isan herself won't care, long as she gets to call her mate AboingShain. Snerk.)
The Ataboinga will ignore the whole thing placidly.
The LboingDrey will not stop giggling for weeks.
The MboingKirktik will look inscrutable (hey, that's not hard for a giant preying mantis)

(Deleted comment)
Jul. 11th, 2007 04:17 am (UTC)
That was exactly how I sounded it out to my bf upon first reading it. XD
(Deleted comment)
Jul. 23rd, 2007 02:19 am (UTC)
Aug. 1st, 2007 05:36 pm (UTC)
Well - as I understand it, the original spelling of "G'kar" was "Jackarr" but I can see why they changed it. And "Ta'lon" is indeed pronounced rather differently than "Talon". But some of them do seem ... superfluous, like pak'ma'ra versus pakma'ra, say. And I don't really think - with a slight spelling change - Zahadum needed any....
Aug. 7th, 2007 03:46 pm (UTC)
:: bows ::
:: scrapes ::
:: squeegees windshield ::
Aug. 8th, 2007 06:58 am (UTC)
Your offering tickles us.

Pleases us. We meant pleases us.
Aug. 7th, 2007 06:55 pm (UTC)
Does the reverse apply so that we can now refer to Cory Doctorow's site as: ' ' ?
Aug. 8th, 2007 06:55 am (UTC)
Good point. Yes, we can.

The arguments about whether to spell it '' or ' ' may now begin.
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(no subject) - tarawyn - Nov. 24th, 2011 02:11 am (UTC) - Expand
(Deleted comment)
(no subject) - shutsumon - Nov. 29th, 2011 12:57 am (UTC) - Expand
Nov. 24th, 2011 07:26 pm (UTC)
I must confess that when reading this, I skimmed it quickly, and my brain inserted an R where one had no business being. Thus it became less an amusing trend towards levity, and more a commentary on the nature of books that must fall back on unpronounceable grammar to lend an air of the exotic.

I must admit, however, that Boing is a lot more fun than Boring. I shall thus spread the joy far and wide.
Nov. 24th, 2011 08:40 pm (UTC)
Drizzt Doboingurden. Ok.
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