August 18th, 2005

satyr, drool you bastards, bosom

A thought upon harem comedies

Eff these effing blobby boys! The last thing the world needs is another oval-faced teenager with short black hair, big brown eyes, and a spine made out of lukewarm banana mush. No, what the world needs now is a harem comedy based on an evil overlord.

With long silver hair.

And leather. Lots and lots of leather. Strappy leather.

But not Gothic Lolita leather, because the way they wear their garter belts on top of their clothes disturbs me.

Also flowy silk.

And possibly a kilt. Because, y'know, kilts.

And in episode three, they take the adorable squealy unthreatening kawaii domestic-and-motherly-but-still-submissive little-sister character and cook and eat her.

I'm not certain what the rest of the plot would be like, because you cannot cling to an evil overlord and squeal his name, nor can you inform him that he IS going to eat your lunch and not Princess Maiko's. He will not be interested in joining your school club. (You will probably not be in a school club anyway, as you are a prisoner aboard a spaceship.) He will not give you white chocolate on March 14th. You will not attempt to sabotage the unsettlingly vampish visiting queen's curried rice, because not only will she not deign to cook it herself, but she can also kill you with her mind.

On the other hand, you will not need to choose between the love of the Evil Overlord and his best friend. Everyone involved understands the concept of "threesomes."

There are tests to cram for, but they involve bladed weapons. You will not get into Tokyo University if you pass.

You will not wear your school uniform 24-7 until it disintegrates. The Evil Overlord is over that kink.

You will not spend all your time in the kitchen, shoring up your wobbly femininity. The Evil Overlord is not threatened by unfeminine women. The Evil Overlord is not threatened by assertive women. The Evil Overlord is not threatened by women powerful enough to lob planet-destroying kamehamehas at his head. That IS the Evil Overlord's kink.

...Damn. Oh, to be a manga artist.