March 25th, 2005

satyr, drool you bastards, bosom

An open letter to a bunch of Japanese dudes

Dear Makers of Ringu:

Your movies would be scarier if you didn't pose the characters to imply that they died in the middle of a cheerleading routine.

Also, I recommend replacing the heroine with a sack of wet paper towels, as it would add interest, decisiveness, and depth to her characterization.

Thank you for listening,